A Sudden Change of Heart

Or, more accurately, a slow realisation that I need more time to write well

I wasn’t really sure what I wanted my blog to be about when it first began. I just knew that I was eager to write about my passions and share my thoughts with like-minded people. Thanks to you, that’s exactly how it turned out. The Drip Tray took shape over time, blending my favourite topics of personal philosophy and alternative media, which eventually became a bi-weekly newsletter called the Wednesday Fix and Sunday Fluff.

Now, my interests are calling me in a different direction, as is the restless nature of creatives. I want to write essays and novels and screenplays. I want to make music and perform again. I want to take up photography and learn how to cook. I want to read about history and science and art and philosophy. I want to swim at the beach and hike in the mountains. I want to hang out with my friends and check in with my family.

So, I’ve decided to take a (small) step back from Substack to accommodate for all of these things and live with a little more presence. I’ll still be posting somewhat regularly, but I won’t be following any kind of schedule. This is one of my favourite places on the internet, after all. I’ll be using it more as a social media platform than a blog, one where I can actually learn something and connect with real people. Now that I’ve had a taste of this creative community, I can’t use Facebook or Instagram for more than a few minutes without feeling the undertow of apathy.

As I’ve said before, I have a history of burning myself out by dabbling in too many projects at once. I fell in love with Substack and dove into The Drip Tray headfirst, writing and publishing up to three posts a week for a handful of loyal subscribers. It was never a numbers game, although I have noticed that I’m actually losing subscribers with each new post – which is fine! Perhaps, as I’ve found my voice, my more focused content isn’t for them. Maybe my opinions contradict their own, or my writing style is too underdeveloped. Either way, it’s cool. I’m doing this, first and foremostly, for me.

On that note, I want to give a HUGE thank you to those who have pledged to support my work financially, should I activate paid subscriptions in the future. This is a big confidence boost for me and it means a lot to know that beautiful people, even kind strangers, care what I have to say. It’s not easy to put yourself out there and let the world have at it, whatever may come, but we do it anyway because we feel that we must. From undercooked ramblings on horror movies and heavy music to deep reflections on life and death, I hope you’ve found something for yourself in these words.

I’ll likely turn this feature on once I figure out a clear release schedule for the next phase of The Drip Tray to make it worth your while. Until then, I’ll be leaning into short fiction and beginning work on a new non-fiction book. I’ve even entertained the idea of publishing it exclusively here on Substack, a chapter per week, with a paywall. Is that something that you think you could get behind? Perhaps I could dedicate it to the loyal few? Anyway, I’ve got to actually write the damn thing first. My nan is always telling me that I should try to get my work published. I know that I have it in me, so let’s make her proud.

I’d also like to resurrect the weekly chat by turning it into a sort of book club where we can discuss the events of the previous post/story/chapter and I can read your own thoughts and experiences. There’s only so much that I can gather from family and friends – though how I appreciate you all! – and I’d really value your feedback. Besides, one of my favourite things about Substack is the engagement. It’s no wonder that my best performing note was asking for everybody else’s input. I want to learn more about myself and the world, and one way I can do that is by investing in this growing medium.

I want to get better at what I do and I can only improve my skills by doing it consistently. Technically, I need time to read and watch and listen more than I do to write, to balance my creative input with my output, so that I can learn more about what I think I already know. After all, the loudest in the room usually knows the least. As a songwriter with a blog who also had a podcast and a channel, the irony isn’t lost on me. Two of my five rules for being better are to be productive with your time and be open to new ideas, so I’m taking my own advice in an effort to find fulfilment in the little things.

This is a chance for me to think before I do, to listen more than I talk. I want to only offer my two cents when I have something to say instead of just whipping up something half-heartedly to meet an arbitrary deadline that I’ve set for myself. I would also feel more confident in sharing my work once I’m happy with the finished product, which hasn’t always been the case lately. Good things take time and I want to narrow my focus to deliver on my promises. I might not get to do everything that I want to, but I’d rather do a few things exceptionally than many things poorly.

That’s why instead of separating my favourite topics, I want to combine them. There will be no more Wednesday Fix nor Sunday Fluff from now on. Instead, I’ll be posting around weekly – most likely on a Monday, which will give me at least three days a week to write. I’ve got a few pieces in the works right now, each about what can be learned from a certain work of art and applied to everyday life, but I’m allowing myself the opportunity for spontaneity when inspiration strikes. Hopefully, without the added pressure of writing to a schedule, you can enjoy The Drip Tray more, too.

I’m sure that you understand and I thank you again for the support. Until next time!